Therapy Goes Beyond the Couch: 5 Ways It Can Enhance Your Happiness

Therapy often gets a bad rap.

In classic films, therapy scenes often depict a patient reclined on a couch, conversing with a solemn-faced analyst who takes notes and seldom interjects.

Critics sometimes derisively describe it as navel-gazing. Moreover, therapists are often offhandedly referred to as “shrinks,” a term that harkens back to the macabre ancient practice of shrinking the heads of conquered enemies.

Let’s acknowledge it: therapy still carries a stigma for many people, with admitting to seeing a therapist sometimes equated to admitting weakness or being labeled as “crazy,” especially in certain professions.

The Stigma and Hesitation Surrounding Therapy

When it comes to physical health, individuals typically don’t delay seeking assistance for injuries such as a broken bone or a burn.

However, when it comes to emotional health, there is often a delay, potentially resulting in a larger mental health crisis.

“People typically seek therapy only when they’re experiencing what could be described as an emotional heart attack,” psychotherapist Lori Gottlieb explained during an interview with CNN Chief Medical Correspondent Dr. Sanjay Gupta on his podcast, Chasing Life.

Gottlieb, who is the author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone, cohost of the Dear Therapists podcast, and writer of the weekly Dear Therapist advice column for The Atlantic, emphasized the different attitudes toward physical and emotional health: “We don’t have this hierarchy of pain with our physical health. We don’t say, ‘Oh, I fell down and broke my wrist, but I don’t have stage 4 cancer, so I’m just going to let my wrist hang out and not get a cast.’ We have a very different attitude about emotional health.”

Hesitancy over therapy could stem from its stigma, skepticism about its worth, the cost in terms of time and money, or simply uncertainty about how it works.

This reluctance to discuss mental health is quite widespread.

According to a survey by the Pew Research Center released in May, 31% of respondents indicated they would be only somewhat comfortable talking to a therapist about their mental health, while 18% said they’d be either not too or not at all comfortable doing so.

“There are so many misconceptions about therapy, and I think that often prevents people from going,” Gottlieb noted.

“One common misconception is that therapy involves simply discussing the week’s issues, leaving feeling validated for complaining.”

The Real Dynamics of Therapy: Insight Vs. Action

Therapy, as depicted by Gottlieb, is significantly more than mere validation sessions: “We like to say that insight is the booby prize of therapy; you can have all the insight in the world, but if you don’t make changes in your daily life, the insight is useless.”

She highlighted that most significant therapeutic work happens between sessions, in everyday actions where the learned insights are applied to effect meaningful change.

Taking action not only rewires your brain but can ultimately result in a happier, more content life.

Gottlieb elaborates, “Patients frequently find themselves experiencing greater joy and contentment in their lives. They report feeling less stressed, managing challenges more effectively, and responding less reactively in difficult relationships. These positive outcomes significantly contribute to overall happiness and well-being.”

She emphasizes the importance of these factors, noting, “When individuals express a desire to be happy, these aspects play a crucial role.”

How Therapy Enhances Your Happiness: Five Key Benefits

To delineate how therapy can tangibly improve one’s happiness, here are Gottlieb’s top five reasons.

1. Therapy Offers Perspective

Ideally, therapy provides an impartial, second opinion on one’s life.

“When we seek advice or guidance from people close to us, it’s hard for them to detach their relationship with us from the issue at hand, making objective advice challenging.”

Our friends often give us what Gottlieb terms “idiot compassion”—loyal validation of our feelings without pointing out our role in conflicts.

In contrast, therapists offer “wise compassion.” “We hold up a mirror to you, helping you see what is getting you stuck, which perhaps you haven’t been willing or able to acknowledge.

We aid you in seeing something you can actively change,” she elaborated.

This empowerment translates across various relationships, fostering healthier interactions.

2. Therapy Provides a Safe Space

In the realm of therapy, one can explore subjects that might seem frivolous or self-indulgent in other contexts.

“Therapy can make you happier because it helps you to be intentional about what you want in your life,” Gottlieb explained.

Society often imposes limits on what’s deemed worthy of discussion: “If I have a roof over my head and food on the table, should I not talk about meaning and fulfillment?”

Therapy offers a judgment-free zone where such essential questions can be pondered in depth, without societal pressures to be perpetually grateful or content.

3. Therapy Helps Connect with Others

In modern times, an epidemic of loneliness has been exacerbated by the pandemic.

Therapy can act as a bridge to deeper social connections.

“Many people desire deeper, more meaningful connections but don’t know how to attain them,” Gottlieb noted.

Upbringing and societal norms often influence our understanding of relationships, sometimes detrimentally.

Unknown tendencies like avoiding or seeking conflict, experiencing social anxiety, or lacking social skills can hinder forming genuine relationships.

4. Therapy Broadens Perspective on Personal Narrative

Therapy aids in realizing that individuals are part of larger forces and aren’t just solitary entities formed without external influence.

“We often feel that problems lie ‘out there’ without recognizing our role in those dynamics,” Gottlieb clarified.

Therapy helps process past influences, tracing inherited behaviors from our parents, for instance.

“Therapy allows you to explore old, carried-over issues, making you aware of how your past shapes current behavior patterns.”

Once you understand how history influences you, changing patterns becomes possible.

“This understanding facilitates happiness by removing the burden of past unresolved issues,” she said.

5. Therapy Empowers Control Over Personal Story

Life is essentially a narrative, and therapy assists in making sense of that story.

“Our lives are stories. Therapy helps clarify and take ownership of your story,” Gottlieb emphasized.

This process involves taking control of one’s life narrative, instead of letting others dictate it.

Concluding Thoughts: Embracing Therapy for a Happier Life

Therapy, as misunderstood and stigmatized as it may be, holds incredible potential for enhancing happiness and overall well-being.

By providing perspective, offering a safe space for discussion, helping forge deeper connections, broadening one’s understanding of personal narratives, and empowering control over one’s life story, therapy can dramatically improve emotional health.

We hope these insights helpyou recognize and appreciate the transformative power of therapy.

Each of these five benefits highlights a different facet of how therapy can enrich lives, fostering a deeper sense of happiness and well-being.